Shadowrun

Shadowrun Play => Character creation and critique => Topic started by: Ethan on <09-01-12/1408:35>

Title: Please Critique my Cybearmed Mage
Post by: Ethan on <09-01-12/1408:35>

Hi all, I've finalized my character for the Shadowland game on this forum and I was hoping you all could give it a once-over. Any suggestions or ideas would be appreciated.


Name: Calvin Francesco   
Alias: Saint
Race: Human
Sex: Male
Nationality: UCAS
Lifestyle: Low
Karma Spent: 0

Physical Description:
Calvin Francesco stands an unintimidating 5' 10". He is not unfit, his muscles are less cords of power than wiry speed. Brown hair, slightly reddish, with grey eyes. If one looks closely, there is evidence of scarring on his face and neck, emanating from the right shoulder--as if his right arm exploded. Considering he now sports a matte black obvious right cyberarm, it is clear to the observant that it was not wholly voluntary. He has an easy enough smile and sincerity hangs in his somewhat haunted eyes.

Personality/background
Calvin was quite happy to be a wagemage for Horizon. He grew up SINless, and it was Horizon who gave him a job and rescued him and his family  from the drudgery of the slums. Eventually, even his parents got jobs with Horizon--low level positions, but enough to grant them SINs of their own after a few years. They even managed to run a home church in their spare hours.

For a time, he was grateful to God and to Horizon and he was genuinely an ever-smiling employee. Until the Technomancer scare broke. At first, he cooperated fully with the new directives for their mandatory community outreach programs: noting down disadvantaged children who showed a particular aptitude for technology (or magic). And then he was promoted to a research position, despite having never received any formal education, and was tasked to heal technomancers as they were probed, prodded, and torn apart.

He fell into the shadows months afterwards, quitting his job, and leaving his family behind. His SIN is no longer registered, though Horizon certainly has his biometrics on file still. Recently, on an apparent run against Horizon, Calvin (known as the "Saint" already) was gravely injured and his team hadn't been seen since. Sporting a customized cyberarm, Saint has returned to the shadows a more nervous and less settled man.

Attributes

Body	Agility	Reaction	Strength
3 (4)	3 (4)	5	2
Charisma	Intuition	Logic	Willpower
2	5	2	5
Edge	Magic	Essence	Initiative
2	4	5.0	10

Positive Qualities
Magician (Protestant - Progressive (http://forums.shadowrun4.com/index.php?topic=8363.0))
Night Vision
Negative Qualities
Allergy (Common, Mild - Cigarette Smoke)
Bad Rep
Big Regret
Records on File (Horizon)
Weak Immune System

Active Skills

Assensing	2
Automatics	4
Counterspelling	3
Etiquette	2
Infiltration	4
Perception	4
Spellcasting	6
Summoning	3
Unarmed Combat	2

Knowledge Skills

Magical Theory	3
Magical Threats	3
Christianity	4
Area Knowledge: Seattle	4
Horizon	4
Gaming	1

Language Skills

English	N
Spanish	2

Cyber/Bioware

Cyberware	Essence	Cost	Notes
Right - Obvious Full Arm	1.0	37,450¥	Matte black
Customized Agility, Body Strength 6, Enhanced Agility, Body 3, Armour 2, Cyberarm Gyromount, Modular Plug-in Adaptation,Datajack

Spells

Combat		Notes
Laser		(Limited)
Stunball
Health		Notes
Cure Disease
Heal
Increase Reflexes
Stabilize
Illusion		Notes
Improved Invisibility
Trid Phantasm		(Limited)
Manipulation		Notes
Clean Element (Water)		(Limited)
Levitate
Mana Static		(Limited)
Physical Barrier		Limited

Gear

Magical
Sustaining Focus (Force 3 - Health, Bonded)	30,000¥
Combat Fetish	200¥
Illusion Fetish	100¥
Manipulation Fetish	300¥
Magical Lodge (Force 4)	2000¥
Novatech Airware (Iris Orb OS - 3/3/3/3)	3380¥
-AR Gloves, 2 Nanopaste Trodes, Sim Module (Cold),
Subvocal Microphone, Trodes
Earbuds (R2)	520¥
-Audio Enhancement (R3), Select Sound Filter 1
Contact Lenses (R3)	775¥
-Image Link, Smartlink, Vision Magnification (Optical)
Medkit (R6)	700¥
-2 Medkit Supplies
Gecko Tape Gloves	250¥
Form-Fitting Half-Body Suit (4/3)	1850¥
-Nonconductivity (R3)
SecureTech Forearm and Shin Guards
Armour Jacket	900¥
Lined Coat	700¥
Ingram SuperMach 100 (60 Rounds)	1700¥
-Underbarrel Weight (Auto-Adjusting), Skinlink, Personalized Grip	6 Slots
-Smartgun System (External)	Top
Ammo	2180¥
120 Stick-n-Shock Rounds	2 Clips
120 EX-Explosive Rounds	2 Clips
Ingram Smartgun X	950¥
-Underbarrel Weight (Auto-Adjusting), Skinlink, Personalized Grip	6 Slots
Ammo	1132¥
64 Stick-n-Shock Rounds	2 Clips
64 EX-Explosive Rounds	2 Clips
FN 5-7C	875¥
-Laser Sight	Barrel
Quick-Draw, Concealable Holsters
Ammo	740¥
40 Stick-n-Shock Rounds	2 Clips
40 EX-Explosive Rounds	2 Clips

Contacts

Contact		C/L
Mr. Wizard (Fixer)	3/1	Owner and Proprietor of Elixir, an Awakened bar
"Amy Trinkets" (Talismonger)	1/1	Low level magical item dealer

Title: Re: Please Critique my Cybearmed Mage
Post by: UmaroVI on <09-01-12/1720:09>

Largely looks good to me, a few points, aside from the usual restricted gear power focus etc etc,

You don't have a mentor spirit; it's always a good idea to take one.

I don't think Unarmed Combat is helping you much. You can shoot people better than you can punch them, and you have spells that can't be disarmed. .

I'm not sure quite what's up with your cyberarm. It looks to be over availability to me.

On this character, I would take Powerbolt or Powerball over Laser, since you have guns. Power* spells are better against really high-armor targets, and guns will work fine against typical drones.

I would rather have Detox than Cure Disease, and I'd rather have Physical Mask than either Improved Invisibility or Trid Phantasm, but those are more preference.

Title: Re: Please Critique my Cybearmed Mage
Post by: Ethan on <09-01-12/1833:28>

Yeah, no power focus for this guy. I'll try to acquire one in-game, even though that's kinda difficult. As for the Mentor Spirit, hmm... the custom Protestant tradition doesn't really have those. But I could see it fitting in.

Unarmed Combat's a flavour skill. I like the idea of him being able to throw a punch, even if it's not going to do much damage.

I think you may be right about the cyberarm... Customizations add to Availability right? There goes Strength 6... Oh and thanks for the Powerbolt idea, will replace that. Detox certainly has more uses, but Cure Disease is more fitting for the guy.

Thanks.

Title: Re: Please Critique my Cybearmed Mage
Post by: UmaroVI on <09-01-12/1907:58>

You can have a concept as a Mentor Spirit; it doesn't have to be anthropomorphized.

If UC is fluff, I would go with 1 UC, 4 counterspelling. Counterspelling is pretty important; your team will thank you for it.

Title: Re: Please Critique my Cybearmed Mage
Post by: Ethan on <09-01-12/2215:41>

Changes:

Night Vison > Mentor Spirit (Adversary)
Unarmed to 1, Counterspelling to 4 (A total of 10 for counterspelling)
Removed Strength customization from Cyberarm
Removed modular plug-in adaptation
Increased Fixer's Loyalty (now 3/2) by removing 1 BP for Nuyen


Adversary: Why this Mentor Spirit for a "Christian"?

1 John 2:15-17 "Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father[d] is not in them. For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever."

Romans 12:2 "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will."

I think it fits. As a concept, he's adversarial to the world system.

But then he still shoots people in the face (with SnS), destroys property, and commits crimes for money. Hey, I said he was Christian not Christ.

Title: Re: Please Critique my Cybearmed Mage
Post by: UmaroVI on <09-02-12/0901:47>

I think that works. Adversary doesn't have to be a bad guy, just a rebel.