Ghostbusters, Winnipeg Commercial:
*Green Text On Black Background*
When the world is in danger...
When the cold winds blow through the very souls of everyone around...
When death itself is at your very door...
Who are you going to call?
*Melody Anderson answers the telephone*: “Ghostbusters, Winnipeg, how can I direct your call?”
*Montage of scenes showing a VW Bus as an Ectomobile*: [Announcer]: From the Big Apple to the Great White North, Ghostbusters has opened a new franchise and business is booming!
[Announcer]: Staring: John Candy. *Scene of John Candy with a large beard working seriously at a proton pack while wearing a tie-dyed labcoat, until his beard catches on fire and he dances around trying to put it out*
[Announcer]: Samuel L. Jackson: *Samuel L. Jackson looks up at the camera wearing a strange combination of medical equipment and Ghostbusting gear while examining a patient hovering a metre above a table, raising the ectogoggles so you can see his face clearly*
[Announcer]: Timothy Dalton: *Shot of Timothy Dalton in full Ghostbusters gear, looking at the backside of a woman in a very revealing dress, and then looking ahead of him to see a grey spectre dressed in the tatters of a Hudson's Bay Company blanket-coat, both scream in terror and run away from each other*
[Announcer]: Richard Moll: *Shot of Richard Moll's feet in oversized boots, moving slowly up his body, showing all of the intimidating gear and weaponry mounted to a tactical vest, including two arm-length gloves that have miniature proton packs on the upper arms. When the shot finally gets to his face, demonstrate the huge and horrific scarring on his head, which the then covers by the goalie mask with the “No Ghosts” logo painted upon it*
[Announcer]: Bryan Cranston: *Scene of Bryan Cranston in a tuxedo, shooting a neutrona wand off-scene, with a 1995-era brick cellphone tucked between shoulder and head*: “Can I call you back on those bonds, Chad, I'm in the middle of a very important business meeting here.”
[Announcer]: Introducing Pauley Perrette: *Scene of John Candy in a Ghostbusters Jumpsuit looking at the Goth-Like Pauley Perrette in absolute terror as she drives the VW Bus through a series of boxes* [Samuel L. Jackson (Off Screen)]: “I haven't been this scared since the Falklands!”
[Announcer]: And Betty White: *Shot of Betty White with Ghostbusters Jumpsuit and Proton Pack in a completely dark room, surrounded by the ghosts of the Red River Rebellion*: “All right all you little Metis bastards.” *Draws Neutrona Wand* “I got a something for all of ya!”
[Announcer]: With Special Guest Star, Geddy Lee as the Premier of Manitoba: *Scene of the Premier's office, Geddy Lee in a nice suit pressing the intercom*: [Possessed Secretary (Offscreen)]: “Mr. Premier, Louis Riel for you.” *The statue of Louis Riel in the window behind Geddy Lee turns and starts running towards him*
*Fade out, fade in to shot of Ghostbusters Headquarters (335 Donald Street, Winnipeg, Manitoba) with full Ghostbusters crew in front of it in full gear* [Announcer]: Ghostbusters, Winnipeg. They're ready to believe you!
*Fade out to Ghostbusters “No Ghost” Logo*
