WARNING: Wall of Text aheadOver on Facebook, someone posted an image in a shadowrun-related group of rules for gunfighting according to the USMC. A few days later, Facebook's automated thread-necromancy reminded me of some corollaries I had found to it and reposted years ago;
Marine Corps Rules:
1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet even your friends…
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a "4."
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.
Navy SEAL's Rules:
1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Adjust speedo.
4. Check hair in mirror.
US Army Rangers Rules:
1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound rucksack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from "Higher" to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.
US Army Rules:
1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
3. Curse bitterly.
4. Curse bitterly.
5. Do not listen to 2nd LT's; it can get you killed.
6. Curse bitterly.
US Air Force Rules:
1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what's on HBO.
4. Ask "what is a gunfight?"
5. Request more funding from Congress with a "killer" Power Point presentation.
6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets "strategic" and never deploy them operationally.
9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.
10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close enough to have tax exemption.
US Navy Rules:
1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee.
3. Deploy Marines
So naturally, I had to ask for similar rules for Sixth World forces. I thought I'd share the results here. Sorry, you're welcome.
1. Check to see if reported activity is covered by contract.
2. Dispatch patrol to determine situation.
3. Call for back up (HTR, additional patrols, DocWagon, etc.) if there are restricted weapons, metas, particularly attractive people, or nearby coffee and doughnuts.
4. Follow up with patrols to keep metas in line (by force if necessary or desirable).
5. Complete Paperwork (in a world where we have a SECOND matrix, yes, paper!)
6. Call it a day, and go rough up some metas in your spare time. Getting drunk first is not mandatory, but expected.
1. Check for Bugs.
2. Check for Bugs.
3. Check for Bugs.
4. Find Bugs.
5. Nuke Chicago.
6. Call it a day.
7. Get drunk, if you survived. Otherwise, be toasted as an absent comrade by the survivors.
1. Yell at the UCAS border.
2. Throw rocks at the UCAS border.
3. Shoot at the UCAS border.
4. Lob grenades at the UCAS border.
5. "Oh, look, the UCAS just threw a rock into our territory! See how aggressive they are?!?!"
1. Screw it. Let's sacrifice a virgin.
1. Use Cavalry.
2. Send Grunts in to clean up.
3. Take next area with Cav.
4. Deploy more grunts for cleanup.
5. Rinse and repeat.
1. Is the threat from the south?
A. If yes, run in a panic, and call the CAS for help.
2. Is the threat from the west?
A. Scream invectives and hope they're intimidated.
3. Is the threat from the north?
A. If Wildcats, put your head between your legs, and kiss your ass goodbye.
B. If SDF, give them a hard candy, and tell them to play nice.
4. Is the threat from the east?
A. See 3.A.
1. Kill everybody, let wakan tanka call his own.
2. See Rule 1.
1. Truck in a squad of troops
2. Set up barricades
3. Put rotodrones on perimeter watch
4. Emplace HMGs in conspicuous overwatch positions
5. Bring in armored vehicles
6. a) Engage any threats (real or implied) with overwhelming force
b) Get some good publicity optics
c) Don't rough up the metas (while anyone is looking)
7. Tally up the incidental costs of enforcing parking violations, jaywalking, illegal posting of bills, etc.
8. re-deploy to the next "high-crime" area
1. Assess situation.
2. Establish Triage.
3. Call HTR for any area listed below KE-AA.
4. Treat patient.
5. Get HTR First Responder bonus.
