[Stuttrboy]

That's the problem.  I can't even tell myself who to trust it seems.  I thought I trusted you, I think I still do but when my subconscious tells me differently I start second guessing things.  I'm angry at myself for thinking that, but I can't punch my subconscious and I have no idea how to come to grips with it.  So here I am staring into the bottom of my glass wanting to fight someone or something and doing the second best thing I can think of.  Do you think less of me for this?  I've always thought I was pretty good at reading people, hell right now I can't even read myself.

[Mercy Merchant]

Steve is quiet for a moment then she takes your glass from your hand and hands it to the man on the other side of her.  "Fighting someone is the best thing you can think of and getting plastered alone in a bar is the second best?  Spokane, you are fucked up more than I had thought.  This does not speak well to your mental stability, either.  If you cannot read yourself, then how do you expect anyone else to?  You were betrayed by two people you trusted, but you are letting that affect your chances to find something new and good.  Fortunately for you, I am not a weak woman and I happen to think that you are worth fighting for.  I want to help you and I will drag you kicking and screaming with me.  You are obviously able to shrug me aside and toss me out of the room, and you will have to do just that to be alone.  And you will have to do it many times as I am not going to stop coming at you."  She motions to the bartender, slips a credstick in his slotter and says, "Do you have a room for rent upstairs?  Tell me what the cost is for three days and I will take it.  Then I will ask my friend here if he will accompany me up to the room.  If he refuses, I will pay for an additional week for you to ask your three rather large bouncers to assist me in carrying him up to the room, conscious or not."  She looks over at you then back to the bartender.  "It may take more than three, so perhaps you could invite some of your more burly clientele if they want to earn some money in a fight.  I will cover any and all damages to the place and any necessary visits to the street doc in the next block."

The bartender looks shocked then amused then a bit unsure of himself.  Steve looks back at you.  "Now, dear, are you going to damage this nice bar, possibly hurt some really nice people, and cost me a lot of money or are you going to come upstairs and let me show you in very graphic detail just what I think your first best thing is?"

The bartender whistles and scratches his head.  "Lady, that was some speech.  If you can get him to agree without the fighting, you can have the room at no charge for the first night.  So, what's if going to be, Spokane?  I don't have a clue what it is all about, but it is obvious the lady loves you enough to help, so are You going upstairs with her on your own feet or drug up by as many guys as it takes?  I know what I would do if I had a woman willing to do all that for me."

[Stuttrboy]

I'm not walking out on you Steve.  I'm just a little freaked out is all, I'm trying to come to terms with how I feel about all of this.  I never intended to not come back.  What are you trying to accomplish here?

Then again I could a tussle.  It's good for the soul.  A little of his playfulness is back, but he's unsure of how serious Steve is.  He eyes her a little.  What's your game here missy?

[Mercy Merchant]

Steve gives you a serious look.  "My game plan is to get you upstairs to a small, neutral room, get us both out of our clothes and fuck you silly.  I want to show you that you can tussle with me all you want and it will not deter me.  I cannot read your mind and I did not know if you were planning on coming back or not.  Not really sure yet if you know that or not.  I followed you here to show you that I will not be easily gotten rid of.  Her voice goes a bit lower.  "Mostly, my plan is to show you that I love you and want to be with you, no matter if you have other problems to work through.  There, I said the dreaded L word.  So, are you coming upstairs with me or not?"

[Stuttrboy]

Sex, or a fight, then sex, I dunno option 2 sounds like a win win...but I don't really want to hurt anyone who doesn't deserve it.  Spokane sighs, defeated.  All right, let's go upstairs.

Once inside he locks the door and grabs Steve in a great bear hung.  He shudder a few times and says, I haven't cried since the I fought the spirit, I've never needed to so badly as now.  Thank you for coming after me and I swear.  If I ever leave you, I will tell you to your face and you will know why.  Sometimes I feel like i need to be alone.  Not forever, or even for long, that's all this was.

[Mercy Merchant]

Steve holds you tightly.  "You can cry with me, my love.  I will never think less of you for it and will always be there for you.  And, yes, you might have said something when you left.  You can have as much alone time as you need, but please do let me know that is what is happening.  A girl can have the oddest thoughts run through her mind when her man just runs off.  I did not know how hooked I was until you ran from the room without saying a word.  I was terrified that you were not coming back, almost paralyzed with panic that I had said or done something so horribly wrong that you just had to leave.  I have never felt so involved with another person, man or woman, and it scares me a bit.  OK, it scares me a lot, to be honest.  I really only realized how much when you were not in the bed anymore.  Fortunately, I partially recovered by the time you had your bike revving up and sent one of my babies after you.  Piece of cake after that, except for the part where I paced up and down outside the bar, wondering if I was really going to come in and try to talk to you.  I am glad that I did." 

She stops talking and takes your head in her hands before pulling your face down to kiss her.  Her kisses are passionate and full of promise and go on for some time before she starts taking your clothes off.  "I think I promised to fuck you silly, and a woman in love keeps her promises.  Let's get out of these clothes and get started.  This is neither your place nor mine and all of the people downstairs know what we are doing here, so I will not hold back anything."

[Stuttrboy]

I'm not afraid to cry...I just can't seem to do it.  I don't know if it's the cyber eyes or some mental hang up...maybe I should ask Tabitha about that.  She's kinda my shrink after all.

Spokane returns her kisses in kind but stops her from undressing him right away,  I'm still angry and frustrated, but I don't want to bring that into bed with you, it just doesn't seem right.  Being with you is calming me down, for now just sit on my lap and let's make out for a while until I stop wanting to punch people.  Ok?

[Mercy Merchant]

Without saying anything, Steve nods and sits on your lap as requested and resumes kissing you.  After a couple of minutes, she takes one of your hands and kisses it before putting it on her breast, where you can feel a hard nipple through the fabric of her shirt.  Apparently she did not take the time to put a bra on when she got out of bed.  "Where I come from, making out includes allowing the guy to at least get to second base and groping at a girl's tits."

[Stuttrboy]

If you insist, he chuckles.  He reaches up under her shirt and cups a breast messaging it gently his fingers brush the sensitive spots between and under them.  After a few more minutes of heavy petting anger is the last thing on his mind and he starts undressing Steve.

[Mercy Merchant]

Steve sighs as you touch her, "God, I had never in my life wanted a man to touch me like this as much as I do now.  I am quickly losing myself in you and realize that you are the most important thing in my world.  I feel safe in your arms and I hope that feeling never lessens."

She sits on your lap and allows your hand to roam freely under her shirt, moaning softly into your shoulder at times as you do just the right thing.  There is no resistance from her when you begin undressing her and she eventually lays naked on the bed, looking up at you as you take your own clothes off.  Smiling, she holds out her arms as you stand next to the bed.  "I have set an alarm to make sure that we do not miss the meeting, but we still have a couple of hours to be by ourselves.  I would like you to make love to me, if you wish to."

[Stuttrboy]

I don't know if I'm even capable of love anymore.  But you make me feel more...human and you make me want to be...better, I hope that's enough for you.  If you can accept me as broken as I am.  There's nothing I'd like better. 

[Mercy Merchant]

In her arms, part of your inner hardness melts away.  Her kisses are gentle this time, not hurried or not even so full of passion, but they are real and they tell you that she is yours.  When you are poised above her she is beyond beautiful, laying on her back under you and looking up at your eyes.  When you enter her, she moans softly and her teeth pinch her lower lip at the feel of you.  As you begin to stroke into her, she matches your body movement with slight moves of her own.  She is quiet, a far different lover than you have experienced so far.  No yelling or screaming; just soft movements and moans that can barely be heard across the room, much less beyond it.  As the two of you near climax, she wraps her legs around you and pulls you down to her, placing her face into your shoulder.  Not only can you feel your orgasm rising, it is like you can feel hers as well.

Feeling her under you......feeling yourself inside her brings thoughts to your mind that maybe you can love again.  Maybe there is something right about sharing everything and taking a chance on being hurt.  Her fingers dig into your back as she arches up to you, her entire body quivering as she softly cries out into your shoulder.  Her shudders continue for some time and are partly to blame for setting you off.  Your release into her is accompanied by quiet sobs.  There is a dampness on your shoulder as you settles back down, a strange smile on her face.  "That, Spokane, was perfect.  Brute sex is great, but I can use this once in a while.  You really do know how to make love to a woman and I hope that you want to make love to me again and again.  You are the world to me."

[Stuttrboy]

I will do everything I can to live up to that.  He whispers in her ear. He rolls over still holding her, takes a moment to grab his hat and put it on, then wraps her back up and just holds her.

I wonder if Ivan is downstairs...I just realized I haven't introduced you to him yet.

[Mercy Merchant]

Steve manages a weak chuckle.  "Ivan?  Who is this Ivan?  Is he coming with us to the meeting?"

[Stuttrboy]

No he's just an old friend.  Ivan Lasker.  He was an enforcer for the Vory when I met him but he's graduated to running guns.  He's the guy who taught me all the russian toasts.  Bear of a man. 

Is it weird that I said that after sex?  I was just thinking about you being in my life and this place is kind of a big part of it professionally and personally.  Though this is the first time I've used one of their rooms.